Tuesday, October 30, 2012

What it means to be a Fleming

  There's been a lot of sadness lately in the Fleming family. Even though Bob and I aren't together anymore, I'll always consider myself a part of his family. I was with them for 13 years. Imagine an only child raised by her grandparents getting meshed into a super large family full of lots of sisters and babies. It was culture shock at first. Then, I grew to love it. Of course, there was always something wacky going on. I've had my hardest laughs around them. It's pretty easy to sum up a Fleming family member. They will tell you exactly what's on their mind, but also give you the shirt off their back. They look out for each other most of all. Maybe that's what I grew to love the most. It was always total insanity, but it wouldn't have been right any other way. Lately, they've suffered some huge blows. My brother-in-law, Bill, passed away very recently. He was one of the best damn guys you've ever met. Everyone loved the shit out of him. He made everyone laugh like crazy. He was just a good man. Taken well before his time. For them to lose Bill was rough enough. The other night, my father-in-law, Bob, died. Many of the kids had a kind of ruptured relationship with him. He didn't make it so easy on them and things happened to make the relationships strained. Sometimes, losing someone you weren't on the best terms with makes their passing more difficult. Even though Bob and I are not together anymore, I still care deeply about him and his family. He was my best friend for 13 years. Our love may have grown apart, but he will always be that friend to me. To know he is hurting saddens me so much. I guess, I've grown a lot because I'm happy he has his girlfriend, Angela, to comfort him. When we first separated, it was very rough, I won't lie. But, it's helped shape who I am now. I'm a totally independent woman. Damn proud of that. They're very happy together and that makes me happy for him. Bob's a great guy and one of the best dads out there. I'm happy to have spent time as his wife. We created a beautiful boy and had a good marriage. Now, he's still my friend and family. That family is still my family. I love his sisters like they are my blood sisters. That will never change. I just want to take all their pain away. If you know a Fleming, then you know how great they are. I'm proud to still be one. I guess that's why I never changed my name back. I love the Griffith clan, but I never really knew them to well. I became a Fleming through good times and bad. I suffered and laughed with them. I watched babies be born and grow up, marriages come and go. The worst part is to see some leave this earth and the sadness they leave behind. If you know a Fleming, give them an extra hug. They need it.