Sunday, January 15, 2017

I actually liked 2016

  Almost four years ago to the day, I started this blog. At the time, I was very despondent, having been dumped by the boyfriend that I was madly in love with. Of course, hindsight is 20/20. I'm glad he dumped me because it was a toxic relationship. He cheated on me and left me for that girl, all around the time of a breast cancer scare. If there were a douchebag measurement scale, that would be near the top. But, at that time, I didn't know what to do. I think my friends were beyond tired of hearing my sob story. So, I turned to my own words for some kind of comfort. Since then, I've found sadness, humor and some interesting stories in the dating world. Until recently, I've been very quiet because I didn't want to jinx things.
  Six months ago, I had just come back from a very bad second date. That date ended with an awkward hug and no follow up call. I finally declared that I was finished with dating. Many times before, I had made that statement, but this time it was for real. If  I couldn't get through a successful second date, there really wasn't any hope. I wasn't getting any younger. I had a failed on-again, off-again relationship with the Russian. After that, it was a smattering of bad dates. There were a few potentials in the middle. But, anyone I kind of liked ended up flaking out and the others weren't worth my time of day. This last day was the straw that broke the camel's back. I remember skipping a friends birthday party because I was so depressed after this disaster date. I had work and my kid to focus on.
  The next day after work, I got a text. It was from a guy on Tinder. We had tried to meet up a few times, but something always fell apart. He lived quite a distance away and it wasn't easy getting together.  Honestly, I'd given up on ever meeting or hearing from him again. But, here was a text asking if I was free that night. The kid was in WV and I was finishing work early. I figured, what the hell? I knew nothing would come of it. I told myself to just go out, see a different area, get a drink and enjoy the night. I had no expectations. Seriously, I had given up. Love was not out there. It didn't exist.
  We had agreed to meet in Greensburg, close to where he worked as a chef. He chose a bar, Mr. Toad's, that neither of us knew. I got there early and ordered a gin and tonic. It was cozy, little dive bar with a friendly atmosphere. After a few minutes, a man entered whom I recognized from his profile picture. Very tall, quite handsome. I was very happy with that outcome. We hugged and ordered more drinks. I was surprised to find that he was actually British, funny, and very intelligent. After an hour, I remember thinking that this was one of the best dates I'd ever been on and hoped it wouldn't end. We ended up leaving, going to his apartment, where I got to meet his dog. After that, my lips are sealed on any details. But, to my surprise, we had more dates. Each one was just as fun as the first. He became a daily fixture in my life and I in his. I had butterflies in my stomach when I thought of him.
  Six months later, as I write this, we're almost a month into living together. I love every minute of it. Sure, there have been fights and normal couple things. The first night in the house, we had a monstrous fight. We were beyond tired from moving the previous days. He was asleep in the very back room. I was taking a bath, drinking wine, eating cheese, and listening to music. Unbeknownst to me, it was all very loud. He trudged in and told me I was "obnoxious". I replied that he was a "dick". We can laugh about it now, even though, at the time, there was certainly no laughter.
  I don't know for sure how he feels about me, but I'm over-the-moon for him. I don't know if he'll ever fall in love with me, but I'm happy with him everyday. I get so excited thinking about coming home to him. He's so good with the kid, too. Like I said, I don't want to jinx it. Just know that my silence meant happiness for once in my life. A miracle happened- I believe in love again.