Sunday, July 28, 2013

Edward Scissorhands is needed.

  Has your pubic hair ever been so long you couldn't concentrate? This happened to me earlier today. I keep it trimmed down as a personal preference. I've never ladyscaped specifically for men. It's my junk, I'll do what I want with it. I tried to wax once on my own. Pain kept me from finishing even a quarter of the job. I ended up looking like a hamster going through chemotherapy. Razor bumps keep me from shaving, so I generally trim. I know this is all way too much information. 
  Lately, I've been super busy with work and moving to a new place in my free time. This area of my body has been neglected. Plus, my period just ended. Messing with a trim would've been like trying to plant a garden at the beaches of Normandy in WWII. I was trying to read a book and was so distracted by the feel of it. Another factor was probably the shorts I had on. My cousin, who is a diminutive size zero, gave them to me. I'm rocking a size six-eight, so I'm packing it in. Plus, they're very short shorts. All the extra hair compounded with the tightness of the shorts made me lose my mind. Immediate scissor trim was needed. I can't wait to buzz that shit. The problem is having the electic shaver. It's loud. Everyone knows you're shaving your junk. Or maybe they think its a vibrator, which is worse. So, I wait until no one is around. Lately, that's been never. There has been a revolving door of people streaming through the place where I live fixing it up for the new tenants. Meanwhile, my hair is growing like crabgrass after a storm. Now, I'm at my mom's with Viggo. Not going to attempt it here. With my luck, V would burst in the bathroom and I'd have a future of therapy sessions for my child. 
  Interestingly enough, pubic hair was a discussion on one of Joe Rogan's recent podcasts. They mentioned how crabs are almost obsolete. Girls in porn having been shaving their business for years now, which has influenced regular society's perception of hair down there. Without any pubic hair, crabs are a thing of the past. But, then they talked about how, as men, they all like some hair. That made me feel better. I've never gone for the Kojack look. I have more of a Jason Statham pube look. It's nice to know my look is at least well received. 
  I feel much better after my semi-trim. My pants aren't as snug. There's a feeling of well being. Some people might meditate, I just ladyscape.